Picture from the MS 150

I had a hard time adding this to the other site - but now it works!

My mom went back to O'ahu last week. Gam fell on her foot and broke a foot bone in three different places. Every day my mom calls and tells me her recent trials and tribulations. Sounds like she's having a difficult time - as expected. She's only staying 10 days - which I suggested because she shouldn't burn herself out. I also recommended her to go and do something fun for herself while she's there because she deserves it. She shouldn't be tied up like a slave.

I'm procrastinating in learning Quickbooks. So I've updated every single one of my blogs.
www.jentriplett.blogspot.com www.fixedgearfever.com www.mygammy.blogspot.com www.tripletts.com/jennifer

I think that's it for now....

Peas.

Checking in

I talked to my mom this morning and she's having a difficult time with Gam. Everything she tries to do - whether that be installing a grab bar or putting wheels on her walker - Gam is fighting her tooth and nail. Mom finally talked with the therapist to make sure understood her 20 year old fallen arch is not going to be repaired overnight through therapy. He's just there to get Gam back to the way she was before the stroke. Yet she continues to scream and verbally abuse mom every chance she gets... making hurtful comments. It would be one thing if Gam was losing her wit - dimentia or something - but she's not which makes her acts even more hurtful. She tried to talk to my uncle about it - who plays the backseat quarter back from the east coast - and who has told my mom where was she when her father died? Ouch. That's painful. She's going through a very difficult time right now - I hope she survives without too much irrepairable damage. I asked her if she needed me to fly out again and help her - she refused. I just want to make sure she knows I'm there for her and support her in this trying situation.

handing off the torch

My mom came in to take my spot in helping Gam recover. We both agree that Gam needs someone to assist her in her everyday activities. She can no longer drive, shop, clean - let alone walk on her own. Yet she is insistant that she can. My mom got a little fed up with her poor attitude and said fine - then let's see how you do for 24 hours. It definitely confirmed she needs help. Gam thinks though that Denise, her oldest child, will take care of her. Last time Gam visited the Big Island and she and Keoki went to visit Denise - she didn't even let Gam into the house to use the bathroom. And to think - Gam doles out endless amounts of cash to her to sustain her lifestyle and she won't even let her in the house? How can Gam think that Denise will take care of her?

Shannon said she felt up to the task to take care of Gam. Mom's going to come home for a week and then return to see how things are going. What really needs to be done is she needs to go into a home. She's been a bear to mom - resisting any sort of change whatsoever. My mom is having a difficult time with her - but what else is new? We'll see what pans out in the next couple of days. Yikes - I'm glad I was able to escape before the shit really hit the fan.

Uh oh

So apparently my brother is really pissed at me for some reason. I know I might have been harsh on him - and I did not mean to intentionally hurt his feelings. But for some reason he pushed my buttons and I reacted.

It's funny how in retrospect to growing up when I was over weight and dealing with my own health issues, he would ridicule me. He'd poke fun at my weight - say some hurtful things and really damage some of my self esteem. Now that the tables have turned and I am able to do the same thing back to him he got really upset. I think that might be typical of a bully. Always poking fun at other people and making jokes at their expense - yet when the table is turned they suddenly are faced with their self esteem issues and end up getting more upset. I stood up for myself and expressed to George that I didn't think he should eat 3 manapuas a day. Is that a crime? I don't think so. He was mad enough at me to threaten physical harm. I know he probably was just joking - but whatever. I can't help but ponder this whole situation. What really set him off? Was it something I said - or is it something he's personally struggling with? I already called and left him one message today - if he's too chicken to call me back then that's his own dilemma. Ainokea.

I called and talked to Gam earlier. It sounded like she was having an better day. She did her exercises this morning and was waiting for the physical therapist - who told us he wouldn't be back until Tuesday next week. Good thing I called - they would have waited around all day for him and then ripped him up when they see him on Tuesday.

I also talked to Mom - which is the reason I know George is sooo pissed. She said she didn't want to get into the middle of it and hopes we have a chance to talk. I do too - but if he doesn't call me back then sounds like it's all on him. UGH!!! This is aggrevating! Why does this always happen? Unnecessary drama seems to find its way into my life at strange times.

Last day

Today was filled with gathering things - both memories and Hawaiian goods - during my last day in the islands. I really had a good time while here. Although parts of it were stressful - most of it was great spending time with Gam. She really is such an amazing woman - and I hope I am that lucky to live such a full life as she has. I hope she lives another 20 years! She is so strong - and sweet.

I visited my ancestors graves today. I have been riding past the cemetary every day - up Nu'unau drive. Today I decided it best to pull over and pay my respects to my ancestory. I actually got pretty emotional and welled up with tears as I sat there in full Gregg's gear. I noticed that the majority of them lived long lives - in the upper 80's to 90s. Amazing. I wanted to leave something out of respect - but didn't have any flowers or anything to leave. Maybe next time.

I forget if I mentioned this in a previous post - but I asked Gam where she would want her remains to go. She said everytime she started to think about it she would just get distracted and not complete her thoughts. She used to think she would be buried on the farm that she grew up on in Ontario. But then that changed. So I'm not sure where she will want to go.

Another thing I want to post before I forget - one night we had a crazy thunderstorm. She said when she was a girl she used to be so scared of thunder. Anytime she heard it she would beat feat home. There were some neighbors of hers that were working in the fields when a storm came through. They were on top of a pile of hay with pitch forks and got struck by lightening - it even got their horse who was tied into their wagon. Ever since then she still remembers being frightened as a little girl and running for home to hide in her bed.

We went to Ala Moana today - twice. Once in the morning which instantly lifted Gam's spirits despite it being cloudy. It was super chilly and damp at Nuuanu so a trip out of the house is just what the doctor ordered. Then we came home, had some lunch and then I went on one final ride out to Hawaii Kai. Once I got home Gam asked to go to the beach again - to which I was game. We headed down right before the thick of traffic. We sat on the beach for 2.5 hours and chatted about this and that. She thinks she might ask Denise to take care of her. She feels like she doesn't have anywhere else to go. All of her friends have either moved away or died. We talked about the different options - including different homes. She realizes that something is going to have to change.

She thanked me for helping her - it makes me smile thinking of the sweet way she said it. "You must love me more," she stated matter of factly. I told her that if she could she would do the exact same thing for me. We both giggled.

I'm sad to leave her - I would love to come back after the race season - say in October to visit her again. Her eyes lit up when I said that. :)

Fussy!

Gam woke up a little fussy this morning. She said she got up and took about 4 steps and then fell face forward - luckily into a pile of paper. Good thing - she could easily have broken her hip. She claims it's from the exercising - too much too soon. But really it's just that she's getting older and things aren't functioning the way they used to.

During breakfast she and George were at each others throats. It probably doesn't help that I was venting to her about him - perhaps fueling her fire for refusing to have her house altered in any way to accomodate her handicap. George wants to put up a railing on the side of the house so she has something to grab onto. She says she doesn't want it because she just slides down the side of the house or holds onto the laundry string. One wrong move - regardless if a banister is up or not - and she could fall and seriously injure herself. I think she scared herself for a second there.

I talked with Keoki this morning - it's been a couple of days since he called. He was hoping that Gam was doing better... which she is but not completely. We told him about her falling - and it brought the sobering reality that something needs to be done for Gam longterm. Mom comes in two days from now - and will hopefully establish something in the week that she's here. It'll be hard to get Gam out of the house - good luck on that one mom. I hope she can come up with a viable solution and still save her relationship with Gam!

I was able to spend some great time with Kuulei, Channing, Chalei and Kaipo this trip. It was fun hanging out with them - catching up and just enjoying each other's company. I wish the best for them despite their constant struggles and the funny way that life gets in the way sometimes. Kaipo's been acting up - pulling the 15 year old I don't care attitude .... hopefully he'll snap out of it before he does something permanent to himself or his family that loves him so.

Only two more days of cyling - I think I'll try to make it out to Makapu again tomorrow morning. It's such a nice long ride and beautiful scenery. Today I'm tackling some hill repeats on the Pali. I should go and work on my tan - but let's face it - I'm a whitey. :)